by Nick Trandahl, 21 Wellness Coalition Representative, Mayor of Upton, WY
The month of June has a lot of faces, and one of them is Men’s Mental Health Month. This recognition of the importance of men’s mental wellness strikes a personal chord in me, not just because I’m a man but also because of my longstanding struggles with mental health, during and after my time serving in the U.S. Army. But before we dive into the gritty honesty of all that, let’s look at some alarming statistics.
Mental health disorders or mental illnesses such as depression, anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder, or substance abuse can quickly spiral out of control among males, who face increased stigma, cultural expectations, and limited support (especially in rural Wyoming). The Anxiety and Depression Association of America reports that six million men suffer from depression each year in the United States, but depression in males, however, often is undiagnosed for lack of pursuing therapy, resources, or treatment. Men lose their lives to suicide at four times the rate of females. This is especially true here in Wyoming, where suicide rates is the third highest per capita in the nation. Additionally, men are much more likely to turn to intoxicating substances like drugs and alcohol to blunt symptoms of their mental illness, which ends up negatively affecting their loved ones.
As our culture generally views it as not manly or masculine to be vulnerable, sensitive, and inwardly struggling, men more often than not face a lonely silent battle for mental wellness. Guilt, shame, and perceived weakness pervade the masculine experience with mental illness. This isn’t something I’m guessing at. Like many men, I’ve lived it.
Struggles with my mental health began to bloom darkly into being in 2009, as I was deployed to the Middle East as a soldier in the United States Army. Whereas the crisis is sharp and in focus among males in the civilian world, it is even more severe in active-duty military service. Among U.S. military service members and veterans, there are between 17 and 18 suicides on average per day. The hyper-masculine culture of the military, coupled with extremely high stress environments, lack of available resources, and career repercussions for mental illness, can be a pressure-cooker for mental breakdown. Among my family members currently serving in the Armed Forces, I’m told that more resources are available these days than 16 years ago, and the statistics are slowly improving, having dropped slightly from the horrifying 22 suicides per day that was widely reported.
Various external things led to my own struggles with mental health while I served overseas in a combat arms profession (isolation, extreme high stress, the slow dissolution of my first marriage, access to alcohol and painkillers, violence, dwindling communication with loved ones, a sexually predatory environment for both males and females). I’m not going to use this space to go into detail about what happened to me personally but suffice it to say that resources and support were in extremely short supply out there in a desert on the far side of the world as the darkness got darker. It was a crucible to widen the fractures such an experience and lifestyle can already spread across a man’s mental wellness. And eventually, I broke. I broke badly.
The result was Major Depressive Disorder, acute Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
Fifteen years after those days in the desert, I finally started treating my trauma I’d buried for so long out of guilt, shame, and embarrassment. I’ve been in and out of therapy offices over the last many years when my mental health went through periods of slump, in the private sector and through the Department of Veterans Affairs, but in the last year I’ve been extremely proactive at finally treating and maybe even healing some of the challenges and factors of my mental health. I have been prescribed a Serotonin-Norepinephrine Reuptake Inhibitor (SNRI) for several months and have already seen a massive benefit to my mood and lessened anxiety. Additionally, I started intensive trauma therapy at the nearest Veterans Hospital in early 2025 and have been diligent about my appointments every other week as my therapy team and I navigate the path forward.
My openness and authenticity here in this essay is to tell my fellow men, my brothers, that it’s okay to seek treatment, to get help, to look up resources, try out meds if you think they may help relieve some of the struggle, and schedule therapy. It’s manly to speak out, speak up, to survive and endure. Therapy, meds, and resources are tools to ensure you survive and conquer. As a provider and protector, if you crash and burn, fellas, how are you supposed to take care of your loved ones. Your self-care is so utterly important to your family unit. It’s one of your most important jobs.
Would you go hunting without ammunition? Would you go fishing without lures? Would you drive your truck month after month, year after year, without ever changing the oil? Would you go camping in the mountains without a tent and a warm blanket? Of course not. So, how can you be a solid and reliable man, father, son, brother, uncle, grandfather, and/or husband without taking care of yourself and making sure you’re in the best shape possible (physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional)? Take your mental health as seriously as you do your physical health. Check under your hood. Listen to those closest to you. Your loved ones deserve the best and most reliable version of you. Do it for them, if you won’t do it for yourself.
Be the best provider and protector you can be men. Be accountable for your health, your healing, and your emotional maturity so that you don’t negatively affect the people around you. That’s what separates the men from the boys. That’s what it really means to “man up”.
June may be Men’s Mental Health Month, but this is a battle constantly fought. Stay vigilant, guys.
The 21 Wellness Coalition has gathered resources for your mental health all in one place. Please visit https://21wellnesscoalition.org/prevention/ and click on “mental wellbeing” on the left side of the webpage for links to all sorts of mental health resources.